What makes me cry...in 1158 words.

Yesterday there were parent-teacher conferences at my son's Middle School. We had been up there for something similar just about five weeks ago, but this time they were showing us a "little" report card. What this means is that it's a pre-report card, an idea of how you're doing, as the real, mid-year report card, the grades which "count" are discussed at the end of January(I can't even say given out, because you take nothing home until end of June).

One teacher, the home-room teacher we could say, has the grades for all the subjects. You wait on a line outside a classroom door, inching up towards the front, waiting your turn. Once you enter, the home-room teacher gives you a little piece of paper with all the subjects listed and then reads off the grades, asking the student to write them down. This is a great improvement, and not all the teachers do this, but rather some people walk around writing down the grades on the edge of a newspaper or a store receipt. Yea for progress!

After at least 30 minutes of waiting on line I'm already beginning a slow boil as I ask whoever will listen to me...why can't they make appointments? "How would they do that?" my son, who is more accepting of the Italian ways, asks. "THROUGH THEIR WEBSITE, OF COURSE!" I say, which is a big joke because, of course, there is none. Organization and efficiency are not virtues here in Italy, so everyone sees hanging out at the school for two hours to talk to a teacher or two, for ten minutes total, as OK...or at least the way it's always been.

My son's homeroom teacher is the English teacher, so of course he does well in that subject, in fact a 9 out of 10. He finally has an English teacher who recognizes how well he is able to speak (he is madrelingua, after all!) because she herself speaks well and converses in English with him often. Previous English teachers hadn't a clue and would use the standard tactique of grading him medium well at mid-year and then higher at the end, to show he had progressed. Rubbish. He knew the colors and numbers in English in September and he knew them in June.

While he passed most of his classes at a Satisfactory level, he only squeaked-by in French. Dante was tutored twice a week for months in order to catch up with his class. The tutor helped him with all his homework and prepared him for the quizzes. They also did all the textbook Units that he missed from last year. But still...how would it look if he had a decent grade? Like the teacher's efforts last year with the class had little value. So what happened? She had to give him a low grade to show that, of course, he's struggling. Rubbish again. She even told him NOT to do a section on the one and only test this semester because she thought it would be too hard for him...and then gave him a barely passing grade (but higher still than his pre- report card grade). In fact, if you add up the scores he's gotten in French this year and average them, they are considerably higher than his pre-report card grade.

Dante's Math and Science teacher was out the first two months of the school year. The substitute did little to no work with the class. When she returned it was BAM, right into difficult problems from almost the back of the text! He's not a whiz in Math, but attended tutoring for that also. OK, I'll accept his grade, but Science is Dante's passion and even before the teacher lectures he can answer all the questions. When he had his "oral interrogation" on the skeleton, he got two bones in the forearm confused, but another 50 questions correct. Unfortunately, he got the same, barely-passing grade.

In fact ALL his grades were the same except for English and Behavior, which were 9 out of 10. Yes, I was told, the teachers give their grades while looking at what the other teachers give. Teachers even made comments that you can't be "Bravo" in only one subject if you weren't "Bravo" in the others (so they doubt their own independent assessments?). WHAT!! Of course you can be great in one subject and stink in another. What about Einstein? What about learning strengths and weaknesses?

In fact, the grades are totally subjective. There is nothing qualitative that a parent can be shown to support the grade that was given ("That is private information" a mother was told!). I'm sorry to say that I think the teachers give whatever grade they feel like giving. The parents who regularly bring cookies for the faculty room, or who come in to fix the school's antenna, or are the local bigwigs have children whose report cards show terrific grades even if they work little (there are many example of this for evidence). Since not everyone can have terrific grades, the rest of the kids muddle by with mediocre grades across the board which don't reflect or encourage their passions, interests or take into account any learning difficulties they may have. Foreigners--and this includes Dante even though his father was born in this town--must work harder even still.

Part of the problem with the school here is that my son is shy and in a classroom situation he isn't the first to aggressively answer questions. So much of what they grade the kids on is "oral interrogation". This is perhaps the first mismatch between my son's learning style and the teaching methodology here. What about having a variety of assessment methods for different learning styles? Unheard of!

I wanted to talk to his Math/ Science teacher, but after waiting in line for 45 minutes to see her, she told me that I had to wait until she had spoken to all the parents of her homeroom students first. I admit I lost my temper at this point and stormed out of there, sarcastically saying, "Grazie" after explaining we had been waiting so long, the other teacher had told us to come, etc. etc. I have a real fear now that she will "take revenge" for my reaction on my son's grades this year.

So, I continue to find the education here in this little village appalling and I'm back at the point I was 18 months ago when I asked what are our alternatives. Then I decided to do a year of home-schooling with an American curriculum, but for that we had to leave Italy.

I've been offered an English teaching position in the after-school program in my son's Middle School starting in January. Maybe I'll start my own undercover guerrilla warfare plan. Cookies in the faculty room, anyone? Just to get us through the end of Middle School, June 2013! Not that I think local High Schools are much better...

If anyone has any suggestions that don't include $30,000 a year International School in Rome, I'd love to hear them!!

And for anyone who's gotten this far...thanks for allowing me to vent.

What makes me sing, in 400 words, exactly.

Following a prompt I saw in several places in my early-morning web browsing, I decided to write my own list of what makes me happy, in exactly 400 words. I hope you enjoy it, and then take 30 minutes to write your own.

My first cup of hot tea, milk, no sugar, in the morning. Eaten with toast spread with peanut butter and home-made jam.
Making home-made fig jam (and prune, and apricot, etc.) in spring and summer to enjoy in the winter.
Walking my four dogs up the hill, then back down through the fields.
Watching the new puppy find her place in the "pack of four".
Going upstairs to my office and sitting down to do yoga, meditate and write.
Being alone and being with others, in balance.
Being in the countryside and being in Rome, in balance.
Trying new recipes, finding one we all love and making it often.
Doing word games and jigsaw puzzles.
Discovering a new blog where the writing and content are both terrific.
Online courses, tutorials, youtube and Kindle books.
Amazon.uk.co and .it
TED.org
Book club with an international group of women and books I'd never have discovered on my own.
Long, easy conversations in English. Speaking in Italian, and being understood!
Traveling, with trusted house sitters.
Finding some money squirreled away in a pocket that I had forgotten about.
Being a mother, being married. Having hear-to-hearts with both. Eating nearly all our meals together.
Discovering new music and ITunes music downloads.
Radio over the internet.

Winter: The fireplace, knitting and a great movie. Hot soup. Cauliflower, cabbage, broccoli, spinach and broccoletti, brussel sprouts. Reading a book while snuggled under three blankets. The reflections the Christmas tree lights make on the wall and ceiling when they are the only lights in the room. My son's presepio, with figures from Naples and painted cardboard boxes. Baking cookies...and licking the beaters. Then eating the warm cookies. With a cup of tea, milk, no sugar.
Spring: The promise of planting seeds indoors while it's still cold outside. The pruned olive tree branches dancing in the wind. Bulbs blooming, and roses too.
Summer: Digging in the warm earth to plant seeds, bulbs, seedlings, trees. Picking a vegetable or fruit from the garden and eating it within minutes.
Shooting stars. Italian beaches...lounge chairs, umbrellas, snack bars and the Mediterranean Sea. Thinking: OK, in that direction is Greece, in that direction is Africa. Artisanal gelato. Home-grown tomato sandwich with mayo on white. Salads and BBQs.
Autumn: Berries, wildflowers,and mushrooms. The smell of burning wood. New oil bruschetta. New wine.

Being retired so I can notice and appreciate this all more easily!

Ghosts for Breakfast

An intriguing thought full of possibilities, isn't it?   I'm afraid the reality is more pedestrian.  I realized that somehow my son is now watching Ghost Lab on the Discovery Channel here in rural Italy, with a panoramic view of the Apennines, while he eats his breakfast every day.  Once he goes back into school in September, he won't because he'll be leaving the house earlier.  But in these relaxed, sweet, homeschooling days, our mornings are more leisurely and that's his "must watch" show.  He likes it because it takes a scientific look at paranormal activities.   He's intrigued by the equipment they use.  But he is suspect of the fact that they ALWAYS find something (an image, a voice, a story).  But, as I explained to him, without that, there's no show!  I'm surprised that in the USA it was on late at night (2 a.m. at one point).  Partly because it didn't have enough viewers I suppose, to warrant a more prime-time slot;  but honestly, it seems more aimed at the young- adult market than at adults with insomnia.

More gardening...

Another picture, from last summer, since I can't seem to access any of my new ones.

This is an active time of year (thank goodness it will get too hot soon to do all this work outside!) and we've been busy.

 We're preparing a new rose and lilac bed, and we've had to remove so many rocks that we were able to make a fence for it.  We bought "dirt" to put in this bed (since once we removed the rocks there was little left) and it turns out to be composted manure.  I'll need to mix it with regular dirt, so we need to spend more money and wait in order to finish this job.  Eventually I'll plant seven rose bushes which will hang down over the retaining wall, and four lilacs in the back row, doing their thing in early spring and hopefully providing me with some early bouquets.

  The vegetable garden is planted with close to 40 tomatoes (and Pio said he only wanted a handful this year!), lettuce, spinach, arugula, cucumbers, pumpkins, string beans, celery and...that's about it.  We may tuck a few other things into the rose bed as after all this year they'll be some space (zucchini maybe?, melons?)  Now if we can just keep the water flowing (sometimes my pump that's in the rainwater cisterns overheats) we'll be OK.   Over at the other house we have some potatoes in and we'll use these mostly to make gnocchi ,which we'll freeze and eat throughout the year (did you know that Thursdays are gnocchi day over here?  Yup, all the fresh pasta places have them on Thursdays).

We also planted 17 star jasmines, aka Confederate Jasmine (Gelsomino here) earlier this week which will climb up and cover a stone cliff we have in the back yard.  We planted one every 10 feet, so they should join together and really be nice rather quickly.  They're covered with fragrant little star-shaped flowers for months every year, stay green even in the winter, and don't require much water.  Can't ask for more than that!!

Up on that same retaining wall we have some fruit trees and planted a new lemon to replace one that died in the big freeze they had this past winter here (the orange and tangerines survived).  Rather than two lemon trees (there had been two), we put in a pomegranate also.  I love pomegranates!

Today we had three seminarians (student priests) from Rome over for lunch.  They were coming to town for a Confirmation and a meeting with the local priest, all in the afternoon, so they came early and joined us for lunch.  Pio knows them from when he drove them around to bless all  the houses for Easter.  It was a chance to show off the casareccia food we eat here... gnocchi, sauce, lamb, wine, salad, cookies, all homemade (not all in my home however!).  It was delcious, I must say.  The sheep came through to mow the lawn while they were here, and one (priest, not sheep) had a great time playing ping pong on xbox live kinnect with Dante.  They're really young (21, 22, 28), two from the USA and one from Mexico.  Nice fellows.

Gardening in my Italian yard...

My absolute favorite flowers in my garden here in Italy (and I do grow quite a few!) are these three beauties, taken last summer.  I love the blue of traditional morning glories, the boldness of the sunflowers (I grow tall and short, yellow and burgundy, multi-flowered and one huge flower above a giant stem...I love 'em all) and roses.  Roses do particularly well here in Italy, they must like the soil or something.  This year I have black spot on some of them--I guess it's been wetter than usual, but the flowers are beautiful just the same.  If I had my camera/ computer connection working, I'd show you the bouquet I picked yesterday...red, pink and white roses!  Such an elegant sight, really, the combination works so well.  My other fav, not pictured here (now where is last year's picture?) are portulacas.  I love portulacas!  They grow with almost no water (they are succulents after all) and have the prettiest little miniature rose-like  flowers in the most beautiful colors...if I can  get my camera/computer connection working, I'll definitely make a post! 

Excuses and a little something new...

I've been major-ly frustrated these last couple of weeks as I can't get my photos onto the computer.... on my old e-machine it says there's not enough memory left (it IS almost 10 years old so surely I can delete some things?) and my laptop doesn't even recognize that I'm trying to transfer photos into Picasso.  Dante's laptop is in for repairs (I FINALLY found his original disks, but we couldn't re-install them, so we called in an expert).  I need to devote some time to this soon.  I hate to post without a picture!

However, in the meantime, I've tagged all my previous posts and put the LABELS up top.  Now, it's easy to find all my posts about one particular topic without scrolling through pages and pages.  Minor thing and I'm not that happy that I wrote some of them with a capital letter and some of them lower case (anyone know if there's an easy way to changes tags without going to each post?), but it's a start.  Want to re-commit to writing here (now, we've heard that about 10 times before!) but I need to get this picture thing straightened out.  In the meantime, the garden is growing (I've got some pics!) and I'm still planting, and digging, and homeschooling too (10 more weeks worth of lessons--which we hope to finish in about 6 or 7 weeks with extra hard work, six days a week!).  ...

Flowers and showers...

I was all set to do a post, with pictures, of all the signs of spring's approach I've seen--the apricot and peach trees in bloom, the grape hyacinths popping up on the hills, even the wild asparagus that we've collected for our frittata.  Oh, and I can't forget to mention the spanish lavender which is an early bloomer too..but alas, the March rains have returned and it promises to be wet all week (at least it's not snow!).  If the sun peaks out later I'll take some pics, my camera is at the ready.   Have a good "last week of winter" everyone!

My four-month blogging hiatus!

OK, I am a slacker, but the last four months plus have been an adventure.
First, when we left Charleston we decided to drive up to NY.  We wanted to change our airline tickets with US Airways, but the change fee cost more than the tickets had (!) so we took less money and rented a car one way.  We didn't have to worry about luggage this way, and it gave us the ability to stop in Washington DC for a couple of nights and visits the museums and monuments.

Pio was feeling out of breath most of the time as we walked around and I was glad we had called ahead and made an appointment with the cardiologist he had when we lived in NY  We were thinking he'd schedule him for a stress test.  Wrong!

The cardiologist said that with Pio's symptoms (they were predictable, repeatable, etc.) he needed to go straight in for the cardiac cath.  OK, then we started thinking that Pio might need a stent because he was often out of breath with little exertion--and it no longer seemed obvious that it was his asthma acting up.

Long story short--the catheterization showed four blockages--including one in the main descending artery (the "widow maker"--60% blocked) and he was scheduled for a bypass operation the following day, November 18.  I must say the surgeon made it all sound easy and routine (for him!) and predicted that within one month he'd be able to fly home.

Well, Pio was an exception to the rule and has had a rough recovery.  He spent 3.5 weeks post-op in intensive care because of respiratory distress brought on by a "strong inflammatory response".  As they weaned him quickly off the steroids his lungs filled up with nearly two quarts of fluid--which required another 5-day intensive care hospitalization, leading us right up to Christmas Eve.

In mid-January he started cardiac rehabilitation while we lived with my sister in Pennsylvania.  He has felt better quickly, building up stamina and muscle tone after having lost 40 pounds while in the hospital!  He's put back on about 7 of those pounds and he is actually at his ideal weight now.  (Let me say that some of what he lost, I managed to find.)

In any case, we're thrilled that we've finally been given the go ahead to go home to Italy.  Pio is still on steroids, though at slowly-reducing levels, he needs his lungs x-rayed every two weeks to see if the fluid is returning, and he needs about six more weeks of rehab.  We're confident we can get this all arranged in Italy.

Our six months in the States have been trying, scary and exhausting (4 weeks+ in intensive care, homeschool teaching) but also  fun (Charleston, Washing DC, staying with family).  It's been great to see family and be able to say, "We'll see you tomorrow"...or "in two weeks"...or "at the birthday party". It's been great to NOT have Dante in school six days a week, but rather make our own flexible schedule (getting him to write all the curriculum-required essays in English, however, is another story!!).

 Living in Italy we are isolated from sisters and brothers and my father and cousins,nieces, nephews, kids and grandchildren.   Being local to them all once again has been great.  It's also been fun to catch up with friends over a cup of tea or a glass of wine...or even on the phone where the time-zone change is more easily managed if it exists at all.  Here in America it's standard operating procedure to go out with girlfriends...but I've not been able to duplicate that in Italy and I miss it.

The horrible snowy weather has had a silver lining.  Without guilt, I've sat down and watched netflix galore, while embroidering pillowcases as a gift for my friend who's been holding down the fort in Italy for us.  I'm also enjoying easily buying all kinds of  stuff (a new little Kindle, consignment shop clothing, for example) that are so easy to do here, but a full-days' adventure if done in Italy (and usually more costly too).

And our poor Blackie--how she's suffered in our absence!!  Seriously, we'll be glad to get back to the Italian relatives, friends, garden and our pets!  There's no place like home!

This picture was taken last month by our house sitters :).

How goes the homeschooling you ask...and will it continue once we return to Italy?  Stay tuned for another post--soon!